Dear Inner Circle,
Once, after school, mum found me in tears and demanded to know what I had done wrong that day in class. I explained that all day long the kids were calling me a “Chocolate Frog”, and when the teacher asked why I was upset she looked at me with disappointment, “Remember Jon, sticks and stones may break your bones, but words should never hurt you.” That has to be one of the worst phrases ever—it simply isn’t true. Mum was enraged… at the kids’ taunts, not the teachers ‘comfort’. She ordered me, “Next time they call you that, just call them Milky Bars!” To a six-year-old, that sounded like genius advice. Unfortunately, it backfired quite spectacularly, and I limped home that evening. The Milky Bar Kids had won convincingly.
There’s a young man I know who not so long ago had only one thing on his mind: taking as much heroin as he could get his hands on. After being released from prison he considers himself lucky, even if he lives in one of the most notorious blocks of flats that is depressing to even look at. He once told me not to bother talking to him. “I’m not worth it,” he shrugged. I assured him that he was, and not to believe my words, but just quietly watch the way everyone here treats him as such.
It’s a sad reality that it doesn’t take much for anyone who was repeatedly hurt in their childhood to soon internalise the voice of hate and use it against themselves. A few months ago, this same young man approached me and shared a little more of his story quite courageously. All I could do was sit and listen. I then placed my hand on his shoulder gently and whispered something about how I wish I could take that all away and that he was a beautiful-hearted and caring young guy who has a lot to offer the world.
Well, today he sat before me clear eyed, and drug free. We split a soft drink and got to chatting, and I foolishly asked, “What’s next?” The question hit him between the eyes unexpectedly, “Next? I never thought about next, you know what Jon, when I think about how I was raised, and my time in prison, now I am housed and clean, so this is as good as it gets and I am bloody thrilled!”
I really should listen more and talk less, here was a moment of shared joy threatened foolishly. Thankfully my friend forgave me with a knowing wink.
Thank you for being part of the Inner Circle,
Jon
Rev. Jon Owen
CEO & Pastor
Wayside Chapel
